Ok this is a bit long but need some advice on this one.

I will start by quickly telling you the situation. I rent a nice little apartment for a good price from a nice lady who I was getting along very well with at first. She is a widow but she has an adult son and a grand daughter who are over oftern. She is a very neat, old school person who is a bit fussy about how she likes things. I have a dog with me in the apartment. I have owned pets all my life (I am 30) and know I am a very good owner for my dog Huckleberry. He is a happy healty dog and I have taken good care of him for 7 years. I do work alot and unfortunatly Huck has to spend alot of time at home on his own but I always spend lots of time with him when I am not working and he is let out a min of 4 times a day and fed twice etc. My landlady does not think I am fair to my dog to leave him alone so often and we have had disagreements about it in the past. She also does not like the fact that I do not keep the apartment as clean as she likes. We had some disagreements in the past, then things seemed to get better for awhile but latley they have gone a bit sour again. She is very nice lady and I do not like to upset her but she bothers me sometimes by treating me like she is my mother and not my landlady. She also has a habit of just opening the door and calling my name as she starts to come in. Here is what happend latley that I want advice on:


I came home from work one day and there was a funace filter on the floor in the kitchen and my washroom door was closed when I know I left it open for huck because sometimes he likes to lie in there when it is hot. Emilia told me that she had problems with the air conditioning and her son came over to look at it and while he was here he changed the filter in the furnace and checked the water pipes in the washroom. Of course my kitchen was a mess and she told me to please clean it up because she is worried about mice and bugs. I ignored her and did not say anything about them coming into the apartment without me knowing.

2 days later I came home from work and she came down to tell me there had been trouble with huck and that she let him out while I was gone at work and he chased another dog and was at the end of the field barking. He came back with her after she went to get him. I said it would be best if she did not try to let him out when I was gone because I was afraid he might not listen to her, but she said I leave him too long and she feels bad.

Last Wed I had to work later then usual. I did not start until 6pm and I came home at 1am. The next morning she came to me when I was letting huck out and said she did not see me all night long and she is not happy with me leaving huck all day and all night like that. She was not home during the day so she did not know I did not work until 6pm and I told her to stop worring about huck and that if she does not know the situation she should stay out of it. That was the first time I think I was a bit rude with her.

When I payed my rent Thu morning she showed me the bills and complained about the electricity bill being higher then usual. In the past she has complained about the bills being high and brings out her bills from last year to compair them and asks me if I think its because I leave too many lights on for Huck or do I run my computer too much. I tell her I think it's because the rates have gone up. This time she said it was because I 'installed' a dishwasher and asked me why I did not ask her before I did it. (They must have noticed it when they were in my apartment one of the times) I said it was not an installed one but a portable one so I did not think I would have to ask her.

A few times now she has complained about the bills and always asks me if I am using things too much or tells me I should use the cloths line instead of the dryer like she does. She has had 2 - 5 people staying upstairs for over 3 months now and has never mentioned that. I have not said anything about this yet but I am still paying 50%


Thur night I came home at 10pm and my door to come into the apartment was locked. I had left the door open when I went to work because I did not bring my keys with me because I was driving the work van for the night. I had to knock on her door to get into my apartment and I asked her what happend with the door. She said huck was barking and restless so she let him out and when she let him back in she locked the door and then asked me why I had left the door open and told me I should always lock it when I am not there. I ignored this one too.

I went away for the long weekend and when I came back on Mon I noticed I had some small ants coming up from the side of my cubbords in the kitchen. After they had seen my dirty kitchen earlier I decided to clean it up so there was not anything to attract them. I bought some ant spray and got rid of them. The next day I was sitting outside with Emilia and one of here friends and she asked me if I knew I had an ant problem and told me please can I always cleen the kitchen because she is worried about mice and bugs. I asked her if she had ants upstairs and she said no. So how did she know I had ants downstairs?

Also on Monday she told me air duct cleaners were coming on Wed and I needed to have the apartment clean for them. On Mon I cleaned the apartment well except for my bedroom which I admit was very messy. On Tue when I got home from work Emilia asked me if I forgot that the air duct cleaners were coming. I asked here why and she said because I have not finished cleaning the apartment. I got mad at her and asked how she knew and that I was not a child and did not appreciate her checking up on me. She smiled and went inside but I think she was upset. I finished cleaning the apartment and I think it is very clean now (for me at least) When I came home from work today she said the cleaners had found lots of hair in the ducts and can I please vaccume more often.

Then at 11pm one of the breakers in the apartment blew. I was sitting in a t shirt and underware wathcing tv and my door opens and she starts walking down stairs saying 'kevin.. the fuse went' she found the fuse and reset it and started to go up the stairs again and then stopped and started to pick up a clump of dog hair and said 'see this. the cleaners found lots of dog hair, please vaccume every couple of days' I said 'well thats what you get when you have a dog you get dog hair' she said 'well it is good for a single batchlor i guess but what about my carpets' i got upset at her and told her 'dont come down here again without knocking or asking' She said ok and looked upset and left.

Finally for my question. Am I over reacting? I do not want to upset her or be mean and I know she does not have bad intentions but she is annoying me and making me feel like she does not respect me. Do I need to be more tolerant or do I need a classified section?

OMG. Just off the top of my head, I can think of about 6 laws she is violating (assuming you are a US resident)

She is a landlord, not your mother and she has NO right to enter your home without advance and/or permission unless there is a dire emergency such as a fire or gas leak.

Your pet is not her business as long as it is not being neglected or abused.

How clean your home is, is also none of her business unless you have a big bug problem.

She could be charged with breaking and entering and all sorts of tenant-landlord law violations.

She also can't evict you because you are upset with her. If she tried, you could sue her for damages and likely win.

idle live in canada....am I right?

Well I know she is breaking my privacy rights and I know I could go to the tenants rights board if I wanted to, but I am trying to look at it from the perspective that she is not a 'power landlord' or 'property manager' but a nice widow lady who is sharing her home with me. I know that does not make it right for her to do some of the things she does, but I'm just wondering if I should just not let it bother me and ignore her or if I should tell her to buzz off.

Also yes I am in Canada nip but the same kind of laws apply here for tenants.

Tell her about tenant rights and you need your privacy. Since you live in her house and she still your landlord. She should know tenant's rights too.

It would definitely bother me, and no, I don't think you are over-reacting at all. I wouldn't put up with it.

I dont think your over reacting, even when we rent we deserve some privacy! My landlord tells me ahead of time if they need to get into the house for anything so we can either be here or at least know they are comming in. And my landlord is a neat ###### too, very clean person (wich is nice jsut wish I could get my house looking like hers lol) saying a prayer for you, that she learns what is appropriate to say or do with her tenants.

hmm I didnt say a bad word up there, but it got cencored, so any way it wasnt bad , theres a movie called (that word) and geeks, not a bad word lol oh well

Ditto everyone here. Show her a copy of your rights as a tenant, you're paying rent. Unless you are creating hazardous living conditions, she has no right to tell you to clean your place. That just sooooo hits a nerve with me. Grrr.

Grab the classifieds. Sounds like you can probably afford to move out. Do so.

I am not letting that pass.

I don't think you're over-reacting at all. I highly value my privacy, and she's violating yours. I hope that you can either get things straightened out with her or find a better place to move into. Good Luck - Cheri

The landlord tenancy act in Canada is quite strict and she's violated about half of it. She's also endangered Huck if she let him out to run without being able to control him. I'd be very upset by all of the things she's been doing.

I really hate to cause a fuss and am trying only to just stay out of the way but I must say that I think I will go back to my old neighborhood along the lakeshore in etobicoke if i can. i liked the area and maybe i will fit in better at a new place. but my mom always says to me 'better the devil you know then the devil you don't know'

I think you could be right about going back to your old neighborhood. No matter how many laws your landlady is breaking she isnt going to change completely. That I think is a fact. You will always have trouble with her. Maybe she has nothing else to do with her time or...whatever. Anyway you would sure be better off without her.

right, she isnt going to change..she is fussy, and it's her building, so she kind of has a right to worry about it's condition,,,but sounds like she has overstepped a bit.
maybe etobicoke is a good idea..your dog might be safer there too.
[ahhh etobicoke...memories of a guy I met from there in 1973. sigh, wonder what ever happened to him...think I will google his name ]

found him...wow...popped off an email.

I don't think you're overreacting at all...actually I think you're being too nice! Just because she is an old widow doesn't mean she doesn't have to follow the law. She must give you 24 hours notice before entering your apartment, and if she continues to disrupt your privacy, call the Ontario Housing Tribunal (I think that's what they're called.) You may have to be persistant. Write her a letter telling her what you want. Put everything in writing. Keep a written record of every complaint and every incident. Build a case, and eventually she will be forced to comply with the law. And even if you eventually move, at least you might stop her from treating future tenants that way.

BTW, hello from another Torontonian! I live right downtown. I think I know the area in Etobicoke you were talking about--Humber Bay Park, maybe? I hike out there and explore the area a lot. I can see why you'd want to live there because it sure is beautiful!